Coaching Archives - Coaching Focus

Half Way There! Where is ‘there’?

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17/07/2018
career, coaching, educationalleadership, leaders as coach, leadership, leadershipdevelopment

Half way there! Where is ‘there’?

The holidays are over, Semester 2 has started and that means we are now half way through the year. I so often hear the question in general conversation, “How’s it going? A common reply is “I’m nearly there”, or “I’m getting there”. Growing up, I often wondered, where is this place called ‘there’? It must be magical because so many people are working hard getting to it. I used to think that there must be thousands, if not millions, of people who are already ‘there’, as surely some have made it. Of course I also wondered ..what’s it like ‘there’? I never saw any bus signs to ‘There’ or instructions with how to get to ‘There’. Have you ever pondered this idea, like I did growing up? Then I was told ‘there’ is a ‘figure of speech’ but how could a ‘figure’ be ‘speech’. That didn’t make sense either. But let’s move forward. ‘There’ is where we are going with our life, our goals, our desired results, not a place at all. You knew that all along, right?! Realistically, everyone’s ‘there’ is different. Some people have a clear idea of their ‘there’. Others have no idea of their ‘there’, let alone how to get ‘there’. I thought I would spend some time thinking about your ‘there’ now, given we are half way through the year with Semester 2 in front of us.

I’m assuming, and hoping, that you gave yourself some time away from work, even a little bit of time. We are now hearing more often in the media, something that many have known for a long time, that taking time away from your regular work is so important, to recharge your batteries, slow the cogs of our thinking and to allow some time to get a bit of perspective on what we have been doing and how we have been living out our recent days. I find whenever I take a break, I return to work, with fresh eyes, new ideas and a deeper level of insight into my passion for developing leaders.

So let’s reflect. In the spirit of coaching, let me put to you some coaching questions to help you get some perspective on the year so far and make some plans for the rest of the year moving forward. As a leadership coach, I am all about setting goals and working towards the achievement of those goals. It goes without saying that without goals you are merely drifting along and being moved in the direction of the forces upon you. I want you to be in control of where you are going, your ‘there’ and to be awake to the forces that might have been causing you to drift off course, if they have. Give yourself 10 minutes to work through these questions and make some written notes as you go along.

By the end of this year, what in your life, leadership or career do you want to be different? This is your goal. This is your ‘there’. This is where you are headed. I’m hoping that ‘different’ in your mind means ‘better’, because that’s what I’m thinking.

For what purpose do you want it to be different? This will help uncover your motivation; why you want this to be different.

If it is different, what will that mean for you or what will that give you? This will help explore the benefits that you will get from making the step forward.

If it is different, what problem or concern or situation will no longer be present for you? This is helping you to understand what pain-point will disappear, or be less of an issue for you.

What have you done so far this year to help you move your life, leadership or career towards your goal? This question will help you to consider actions that you have taken and how beneficial they have or have not been.

How successful has that been on a scale from 1 to 10? ( 1 is fairly dismal, 10 is awesome). Measuring the impact is helpful to reflect upon now so you can compare it to after you complete your next step. After all, what you can measure you can improve.

What one thing can you do, from now, to move you one step closer to your goal? Now you are planning your next action. Explore the possibilities of all that you can do to make your life, leadership or career different. Then pick one action only. Too many actions will put you into a state of overwhelm. Progress is made one step at a time. It is so much better to achieve one step forward each time than to put pressure on yourself to achieve many, only to be disappointed that you have achieved none due to feeling overwhelmed.

What resources and support do you need to help you? These might be people, knowledge, equipment, access. You might look around for a mentor or a coach.

What could get in your way and how can you prepare yourself to get around it? The best laid plans come unstuck when we hit a snag or a hurdle. But if we look ahead at what they might be, we can more often see them coming and take action as they approach.

When are you going to start? In order to get ‘there’, you need to start, and setting a date helps you to be accountable to yourself. You are the one in charge here, so set a date that is realistic and achievable and gets you excited about the change ahead.

When do you want to have completed that ‘one thing’ so you can get going on the next ‘one thing’? This is the other part to accountability- a completion date. This is the end game date. This is the date you put in your diary with a celebration experience noted, so you acknowledge yourself for completing the action.

And then, you start the process over again, to move you one more step closer to your bigger goal in making your life, leadership or career different.

So you are all set, you have a goal, planned an action and set dates for the start and completion. Well done. I bet you feel better already about the semester ahead because now you have a plan.

See you again in a fortnight. Please write to me and tell me how you are going. Bring me along on your journey to get to your ‘there’. And, of course, if you want some personal coaching, contact me at any time.

Written by Janine Stratford, 17 July 2018

Janine Stratford, is a Leadership Development Coach and Career Strategist, working with teachers and leaders in schools across Australia and New Zealand. A former teacher and school leader, she is passionate about developing great leaders as role models for their schools and their students. You can find out more about Janine at www.coachingfocus.com.au

Coaching, Leadership

Be Bold and Back Yourself

admin
05/06/2018
challenging conversations, coaching, confidence, growth mindset, leadership development, resilience

I was thinking, how could I give you some inspiration right now. It’s week 8 of a long 11-week term and you could be in the thick of reports, exams, marking, possibly submitting curriculum documentation, and because interview season is fast approaching, you might also be applying for your next job on top of all that.

I wanted to encourage you forward in whatever you were tackling right now and help you to see the ‘light at the end of the tunnel’ in a few weeks. Things get hard about now, it’s often difficult to keep one foot ahead of the other, keep your planning up, people around could have the sniffles, plus its cold.

Last night I was clearing out a few things and I found some notes I made from the very beginnings of my business, back in 2006. I found some notes that I had written from a coaching session. It resonated with me because the session was all about keeping momentum, keeping moving forward even if it was only small steps each day or each week. Just so long as there was forward progress.

The notes could apply to so many people right now. You are all very busy, so dedicated to your work and so passionate about the success of your students and your school.

The situation back then was about a middle leader, relatively new to his role, and required to make his first presentation to the leadership team. It was about this time of year, the presentation was about a new curriculum initiative he wanted to propose and he was nervous, lacking in confidence, and had never done anything like this before.

He had spent hours preparing his presentation and knew his material. That wasn’t the problem. The problem was he feared the response. What would they say? How would he respond to their queries? How would he respond to their objections? Would there be any objections? What had he not covered? What had he not thought about? This fear is so common to all of us. It’s the unknown. The uncertain.

The ultimate truth, however, is you can never control other people. You can only control yourself; your thinking, language, demeanour and response. If you know what you want and why you want it, then you can hold your focus and response.

What he needed was to believe: believe in what he wanted, believe in its worth and the impact it could create. He need to be bold and back himself. And so do you!

In coaching, the coach’s mindset is based on the thought that people are doing the best they can with the resources available to them. I wanted him to appreciate the pivotal position he was in, the power to positively influence and the strength in his proposal to affect the learning of the students. So I took him through some mindset exercises based in neurolinguistic programming (NLP).

I also encouraged him to view a TED Talk by Amy Cuddy, who talks about the power of body language. Here’s the link so you can view it too. https://www.ted.com/talks/amy_cuddy_your_body_language_shapes_who_you_are?language=en

Here are the mindset exercises in summary. Remember, whatever you are facing:

What you focus is what you get – keep in your mind you want this
Physiology creates psychology – dress the part, relax into the experience, walk tall, breath deep, keep your shoulders square
Trust yourself – you are a dynamo
Do the Amy Cuddy thing beforehand to help you feel truly strong and capable
Focus on clear communication – speak succinctly, listen, clarify, respond and be flexible in your approach
Questions often come from not knowing, so explain it, again and differently if needed
Requests for more information are good, it means they are willing to explore
If they raise something you haven’t YET thought of, thank them for the insight, and positively respond that you will look into it and get back to them
Keep breathing. Stay focused. You want this and it’s a good thing
Share the result it can bring, share the positive impact
Be bold and back yourself

I hope this gives you some inspiration. I’m a sailor from my teenage years so a favourite quote of mine has always been “we cannot direct the wind, but we can adjust the sails”. So stay on course, finish the race, its only 3 weeks away, just ‘tack’ a little differently to get there and regardless of the size of the step, a step forward is a great step and that’s all it takes to maintain momentum.

Janine Stratford, is a leadership coach, working with teachers and leaders in schools across Australia and New Zealand. A former teacher (Chemistry and H&HD actually) and school leader, she is passionate about developing great leaders as role models for their schools and their students. You can find out more about Janine at www.coachingfocus.com.au

Coaching, Leadership

The Power of Positivity

admin
20/10/2016
coaching, personal development, positive education, resilience, wellbeing

First of all, what is positivity? Positivity is all about being positive of course, accepting the world as it is. It is the type of thinking that keeps you thinking in an optimistic manner. It keeps you seeing the glass half full rather than half empty. It is also how you rid yourself of negative thoughts and from there rid yourself of negative experiences. Because as you may know, from your thoughts come your experiences.

So as we all don’t want negative experiences, how do we get rid of the negative thoughts? The answer is really fairly obvious. You need to think about something else. You need to change your focus. After all, what you focus on is what you get.

So here is my HOW TO DEVELOP POSITIVITY in 5 easy steps.

1.Forget the past.

I just stated above, that what you focus on is what you get. Many people spend a great deal of time thinking about the past. They try to work out what went wrong, what they should have done and what they shouldn’t have done. I agree some reflection is important, because it is from reflection that allows evaluation and from there changes can be made in strategy or procedure. But the problem with some people is they stay stuck in reflection, in the pattern of thinking that keeps you asking questions, the type of questions that never seem to get answered. This reflection is serving no purpose at all. It keeps you in a holding pattern. A holding pattern that in the end keep your thoughts jumbled and most questions never resolved.

So the positivity philosophy is to let go of the past. Let it sail way behind you. The past happened. Nothing you can do now can change the past. What needs to be done now is to move forward. Focus your thoughts and energy on doing things differently so that patterns do not repeat.

2. Focus on your strengths instead of on your weaknesses.

How many times have you been asked if you would like to do something and you have declined because you didn’t think you could do it, or you weren’t good enough? Focusing on what we can’t do or thinking how we could do better if we didn’t have this flaw, only holds us in a position of powerlessness. The more time you spend thinking about how hopeless or powerless you are, the more you are likely to convince yourself that you really are hopeless and powerless. Again what you focus on is what you get. Instead, change your thinking! Think about the possibility of learning something new; developing the beginnings of a new skill, actually being able to do it. Or focus on what you can do; what you are good at. Soak up the great feelings that emerge and then tackle the new thing in a more positive, an ‘I must just be able to do it’ frame of mind. And anyway…… does it really matter if once you have a go, you really can’t do it? At least you gave it your best shot!

3. Listen to the words that you use – choose them with care and purpose.

The words that you use have a distinct influence on how you behave. What you say comes from your thoughts. Words can be destructive and you may not even be aware of the influence they are having on you. Phrases like ‘you should’, ‘why didn’t you’, ‘I can’t’, ‘this is too hard’, ‘I always get it wrong’, ‘I mustn’t’, ‘ they won’t’, ‘why cant they just’. All of this creates negative states within you, states of doubt, blame, defensiveness, resentment and judgment. Choose your words with care as they fire off certain parts of your brain and release chemicals that align with the feelings they trigger. If you keep thinking in negative language, those chemicals will make you feel low or depressed. And you will wonder how did I get to feel like this?

Instead use more positive phrases like: ‘I love…’, ‘you can’, ‘I can’, ‘this is great’, ‘this has possibilities’, ‘how do we turn this around’, ‘how do we get this started’, ’can we give it a go’, ‘what are the possibilities’. A different set of chemicals will fire in your brain from this more positive language and it will fill you with feelings of hope and opportunities.

Thoughts bring about behaviour. Behaviour creates experiences. You are in control of your thoughts. So choose positive thoughts, as these will generate positive language.

4. Exercise regularly

Exercise releases hormones called endorphins. These are the body’s natural pain-killers. They also create feelings of euphoria or happiness so they are often regarded as the happy hormones. You can’t help feeling better even after the smallest amount of exercise. These endorphins also help to reduce the effects of stress on the body. Exercise helps to remove toxins from the muscles and toxins from the lymphatic system. Exercise increases the amount of oxygen getting to every cell in your body. So how good is exercise – it makes you feel happy.

With our now more sedentary lifestyles, we are all exercising less and missing out on the wonderful feelings that endorphins create in the body. Too many people are taking on the view that exercise is hard work. It is only if you over do it!

A little bit of exercise each day will give you a little bit of endorphins. You will feel better and that feeling will drive you forward to do more exercise and then feel even better. You will see a pattern form. Let exercise become an important part of your day.

5. Bask in the happy feelings from a past experience.

Remember a time when you were really happy. Remember how good that felt. Remember the thoughts you had. Remember how you looked. Remember what you thought about at the time. Capture that feeling, those thoughts and those memories and allow yourself to sink deep into them. Allow yourself to bask in that experience. Float in it, swim in it, let it completely surround you.

Any time you need to move yourself out of a negative pattern of thoughts, go back to that happy memory and bask in the feelings of that moment. You will quickly notice the change in your body; your breathing will slow, your blood pressure will drop, your thoughts will slow and you will move into a more peaceful state making you feel a whole lot better and much happier.

So now you know how to develop positivity. Remember this:

Your thoughts create your behaviour and your behaviour creates your experiences. You are in total control of creating your thoughts. Make your thoughts work for you rather than against you. Create thoughts that are positive rather than sabotaging.

Until next time, from your coach, Janine Stratford

Coaching, Leadership

Leadership that stands out…. but only sometimes

admin
01/02/2016
emergent leadership, growth mindset, leadership, school leadership, Trust, vulnerability

I’ve been doing a bit of research recently, as I so often do, about leadership and I was captivated by a type of leadership that is being sought out in many companies today. I came across some writing by Laszlo Bock, regarded as the leading recruiter in the top hiring companies across the globe and he works at Google. Each year, Google have 3,000,000 applicants for 700 positions, with a current staff of 55,000 and obviously growing. Wouldn’t you love to be in the HR team to sort through that lot! Bock and Google are looking for a particular type of leadership in their applicants. Google refer to it as emergent leadership. The interesting thing here is that this leadership does not have to come from a series of titles held, or leadership qualifications. Emergent leadership, just as its name implies, emerges as it needs to and recedes as appropriate. This type of leader steps forward when they can see a problem to be solved and they know they have the ability, knowledge and aptitude to work on and lead the team through to solution. Yet, if another type of problem arises and they know they are not the right person to lead the group at that time, they are willing to step back and let another member of the team step forward. Think of the humility, emotional awareness and self- management needed to be able to step back when it is appropriate and allow the space for someone else to step forward, while also having the confidence at another time to step up and take the lead. This is the type of leadership we need to be developing in our young people today. It takes courage to step forward and take the lead and humility and vulnerability to admit when you don’t have the best set of skills compared to another. Our young people need to have this sort of behavioural flexibility to move into and out of leadership roles within their teams. This behavioural flexibility is possible because these emergent leaders have emotional intelligence. Do we as their teachers and leaders have these qualities and can we role model them for our students?

Coaching, Leadership

Would you follow a leader you didn’t trust?

admin
15/11/2015
leadership, Relational leadership, school leadership, Trust, Vision

Dr Paul Browning, Headmaster of St Paul’s School, North Brisbane; previously the founding principal of Burgmann Anglican School in the ACT completed his PhD studies in 2013 identifying practices that leaders could use to develop and enrich a culture of trust in their school.

I was fortunate to hear Paul speak at the August 2014 AHISA conference and what he shared resonated strongly with me. In my years as a teacher and school leader, I have had the privilege to work with some outstanding Principals and then there are those who were memorable for the mistakes they made and the relationships, characters and careers they destroyed in their wake.

Paul writes in his book Compelling Leadership, “No one wants to follow a person, particularly to the unknown, if they don’t trust them. So many leaders fail because they forget to attend to the very basics of leadership: building and maintaining relational trust”.

We notice when trust is missing, because people display behaviours where they feel like they are being watched, they start second guessing their actions, delaying projects because they fear the usual negative feedback and roadblocks. “Sadly, when trust is low, most people perceive danger and go into a self-protective mode; ‘they personalise everything and assess risks in dealing with everyone, tending to cast themselves as the intended recipients of other people’s harmful actions’ (Reina & Reina, 2006, p. 25).”

Paul writes ‘Educational researchers have identified the importance and value of trust within schools and school leadership: trust is a critical ingredient of the social context of schools because:

it improves cooperation (Putnam, 1993; Tschannen-Moran, 2001);
it enriches openness and health in a school culture (Hoffman, 1994; Hoy, et al., 1992);
it is essential to leadership (Sergiovanni, 1992 & 2005); and perhaps most importantly,
it facilitates student achievement (Bryk & Schneider, 2002; Hoy, 2002; Goddard, et al., 2001).’

As a result of four case studies of highly trusted transformational school leaders, Paul found the 10 key practices to be:

Admit mistakes– give staff permission to explore new things.
Offer trust to staff members – micro managing removes trust
Actively listen – listen to understand, rather than listening with the intent to form a reply. Be present in the moment. Hunt for the emotions. Repeat back what was said.
Provide affirmation– acknowledge your staff, thank them, show you care, congratulate them.
Make informed and consultative decisions– explain reasons for decisions, make consultative decisions.
Be visible around the organization – be seen around the school, people not around are not trusted.
Remain calm and level headed – be consistent, calm, predictable, even-headed so your staff know what to expect from you with each interaction
Mentor and coach staff– the leader’s job is to develop and grow staff, give them feedback, help them to grow both as individuals and as contributors to their field
Care for staff members– be interested in your staff, take time to know their stories
Keep confidences– when concerns are shared, ask is there anything you want me to do about this?

Paul found ‘Interestingly, but not surprisingly, these four schools had very impressive academic track records. The practices were not dependent on personality; they can be learned by anyone wanting to improve the culture of his/her school.

He found ‘Trust has consequences for a range of activities in the school including the way that teachers cooperate and work together, but trust is particularly important when the leader aims to take the staff somewhere unknown, to bring about change (Sergiovanni, 2005).’

Paul’s book is now available free through ibooks. I highly recommend it.

“No vision, no strategy, no change reform or restructure

will be achieved without trust” P. Browning

Coaching, Leadership

Unleashing Confidence

admin
16/04/2015
confidence, entrepreneurs, leadership, leadership development

Lisa Messenger in her book Daring and Disruptive: Unleashing the entrepreneur makes the statement

“We are only limited by our own belief systems; our own ways that we perpetuate self-sabotage. You need to have the confidence and self-belief that if you get thrown to the wolves ( and you will be), you’ll have the strength to come out leading the pack.”

Leadership will present challenges on a daily basis. Confidence and self-belief need to be available to draw upon at any moment. Coaching will help get limiting beliefs out of the way and allow confidence and a strong belief system to fuel your next decision or action as a great leader.

Category : Coaching

Half Way There! Where is ‘there’?

Be Bold and Back Yourself

The Power of Positivity

Leadership that stands out…. but only sometimes

Would you follow a leader you didn’t trust?

Unleashing Confidence

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